Bad Sweater Guy

Now appearing on the center stage ...

Wow, just ... wow.

Megan writes: "a photo stage and plenty of eggnog provide for the best of yultide spirit, and some pretty embarrassing pictures to prove it."

It's good you explained that for us, Megan, because for a second we thought this e-mail spam for a new Las Vegas revue.

Is that a dickey?!

Repeat offenders

One of Bad Sweater Guy's favorite submitters, Stefanie, is back for the third time. Really, Stefanie, haven't your co-workers in Pennsylvania suffered enough?

Stefanie writes: "As is our tradition, and amid stares of both horror and delight, we strutted our stuff through the mall to Santa.  You can see we have to pile on the a-bit-too-jolly old elf high and tight – I just hope that was a candy cane in his pocket. 

There’s no denying how you inspire us, and for this we are truly thankful. "

Awww, we're blushing! It's Santa and his ho, ho, hos.

Some truly spectacular work here. The skirt is back! Seriously, it takes some inspiration and Maria Von Trapp sewing skills to rip that off the tree and wear it. We've got schnockered elves in there, and just below her, change you can believe in. (But psst, your friend on the upper left there seems a little hard up -- I mean, *one* mistletoe is usually sufficient).

All in all, a good showing ... buuuuut, what's with the woman in the dress front and center? Get with the program! The holidays arent the time for Little Orphan Annie, lady. There are bad sweaters without a home.

Beast of Borneo

Heather writes: Received this festive holiday sweater for Christmas....it's a great look if you are 8 or 85, but unacceptable anywhere in between those years. The sparkling sequins on the reindeer antlers make it dressy enough for that sophisticated office party when you REALLY want to impress the boss. Perhaps I will get blinking snowman earrings to match the sweater for next season?



Yikes. That's quite the headhunter necklace. You've already claimed the heads of Rudolph and Frosty, pretty soon you'll be moving onto that Dentist Kid and then St. Nick himself. There can be only one!

Looks like someone has a case of the Mondays

Jennifer writes:

"In the spirit of bad sweaters everywhere we decided to have a bad sweater day contest. Attached below is a picture of us. Also, can you please tell us what are sweaters really say? Thanks!  I hope we're 'bad' enough to make it on the website!! "

Bad? Jennifer, these are an Amy Winehouse weekend. On the left, it looks like Stitch got run over by a steamroller. It tries to say “I'm in my cubist period.” What it really says: “The mold has spread.” On Miss Vogue, it's a visual aid in geology class. And that stripe in the middle is the extinction event. Nothing will survive.

Our bailout

Bad Sweater Guy reader Benjamin brings up a good point in his submission: In these trying economic time, is there anything better than a bad sweater to keep you warm?

"Dear BSG,

 I stumbled across your site after scouring the world wide ugly sweater net universe for some fugly christmas sweater inspiration. You see this is our group of coworkers, friends, and in years past total randoms.. 4th Annual Ugly Christmas Sweater bonanza and during our current state of down trodden economy, unemployment, bailouts, and continuing Britney Spears media coverage I want to make this event special, nay I feel obligated to make this a success and wave my ugly sweater round like a helicopta..because what else do we have when everything around us seems to be falling apart?  I will tell you what we have..friends, family, ugly sweaters, booze and therefore GOOD TIMES.  So cheers to you and your ugly sweaterness and please enjoy some years past throat chocking nylon and polyester greatness.  Cheers."


"FYI - I'm the jerk in the fist pic with the reindeer antlers."

Au contraire, Benjamin. That antler-tie-candy striper combination doesn't make you a jerk, it makes you a playa. Don't hate the sweater, ladies, hate the game.

However your friends:

They could use a little help. What's with all the nautical themes on Cosby sweaters? Captain Jack Spareus looks ready for a three-hour tour of Cape Cod dive bars. As for the other one, what a rarity: the '87 Scorpions tour sweater. Nothing says heavy metal like red lightning. Rock you like a hurricane, guys, or whatever else you have in those Solo cups.

Stars upon thars

Drew writes in: "My girlfriend, Erika, and I went to a 'Bad Christmas Sweater Party' two years ago.  We had only been on three dates prior, so kudos to her for being a sport." Wow, she is a keeper -- with a ribbon on top. We were wondering what this picture reminded us of, and then it hit us:



























There can be love between plain-bellyed and star-bellyed sneetches.

We declare the 2008 Bad Sweater Season officially open

Flynn, a fan and friend of Bad Sweater Guy, kicks off the 2008 Bad Sweater Season with his "Little House on the Scary" offering. It looks like the Schoolhouse Rock version of what happens after the glaciers melt and submerge  us all under a few hundred feet of water.

Do you have a Bad Sweater? Do you know someone who does? Of course you do. Send it to [email protected] and we'll put it up here for the world to mock. We'll take pictures of sweaters found in the wild or photos from your Bad Sweater Parties. Let's get cracking, people. There are a lot of Bad Sweaters out there, and we need you to help us bring them to justice.

Primary Concerns

If Senator Obama is really campaigning for change, he might start with his supporters' wardrobes. The little girl has the right reaction. My computer monitor had that pattern once and the Geek Squad found a dead squirrel inside.

Chrismas in May!

OK, so we're total slackers here. Stefanie and her cohorts were nice enough to mail in this photo and we never got around to posting it. But they're Bad Sweater Fans, and that's good enough for us. This is a reminder that Bad Sweater Season is a scant six months away. Are you ready? Are you?

Is it me, or does Santa look like he's faking his way through this one?

Bad Sweater Mystery

Bad Sweater Fan Janet writes:

“Recently at my company we had a meeting with a very top-dollar consultant, and he wore what I believe may have been the worst men’s sweater ever made. It had a pictorial depiction of a 1890s restaurant scene all around the sweater, in panorama. One of the scenes depicted was of a lady with long legs and high heels sitting in a booth, and a man’s popping out from behind the booth swinging a bra in the air! Many of us in the meeting were perplexed and mesmerized -- and amazed that such a sweater exists. Do you have any ideas about how we could find a picture of that sweater -- so that we can relive the moment?”

So who can help Janet and her co-workers? Send a pic and we'll post it here. An 1890s restaurant scene? I mean, come on. It's not like this one will be hard to spot.